To be honest, I expected both teams to be more terrible than they were. This has been an omnishambles of a process, after all, as evidenced by the fact that I think for the first time ever, we’ve had Lord Sugar move someone to another team because his rivalry with another contestant was too disruptive.
Roisin and Katie were told to be the team leaders, on account of Roisin’s business plan being ready meals and Katie’s being a restaurant. Roisin came up with tea cheesecakes (which sound vile to me), while Katie came up with ‘uniquely flavoured’ trifles.
Surprisingly, Roisin’s were the ones that turned out better, with most of the retailers liking the taste of them, even though a lot of them also said that they couldn’t really taste the tea, and they didn’t much like the packaging.
Katie’s, meanwhile, were generally hated, mostly because of the gigantic amounts of saffron (most expensive ingredient in the world, remember) she piled into them giving them an ‘earthy’ flavour, which essentially means they tasted like flavoured dirt with cream on top.
Most of the problems on both teams came during pitching. On Roisin’s team, she told her team not to interrupt, with special emphasis on how Daniel shouldn’t interrupt anyone, only for Daniel to proceed to interrupt both his team members and the people they were pitching to in the middle of pitches. On Katie’s team, Mark pushed and pushed to do the last pitch, a pitch aimed at superstore Tesco, only to choke terribly when it actually came time to pitch.
In the boardroom, I swear that Karren and Nick were like sharks who had smelled blood. Karren cheerfully exposed to everyone how Sanjay had ranted about Bianca behind her back, prompting Bianca to mutter that he was a joke, while Nick innocently pointed out that Mark was the only person who had choked while pitching to Tesco.
In the end, Roisin’s team won, making twenty-five-thousand-five-hundred sales to Katie’s thirteen-thousand-five-hundred, and Katie, Mark and Sanjay had to return to the boardroom. Judging them all more or less equally to blame for the task’s failure, Lord Sugar turned his attention to their businesses, which, it turns out, are all pretty awful.
Katie and Sanjay both left, with Mark just narrowly missing it, getting a ‘last chance’ that will almost certainly not see him through next week.
Because next week is my favourite week.
Next week is interview week. The week where four of Lord Sugar’s advisors tear the candidates apart and expose all of the lies they told to get into the process.